It requires great self-control to be an effective businessperson. Im certainly not perfect in this department, and maybe thats the reason I take special time out to be mindful of my emotions as they fluctuate over the course of a negotiation. In this respect, you can say that I am using Zen as a negotiating ally. Ill try to be alert to surges, either of enthusiasm or of reluctance. In other words, am I rushing into deals, or running away from them? Either approach is flawed. Few deals need to be struck, especially when the iron seems the hottest. In fact, too much gusto or patience can spoil what might have been the proper deal setting momentum. I try to monitor my gut. Is it unusually tense? This signals resistance to the deal, on my part, at some yet to be ascertained level. Perhaps I dont trust my counterparts. Occasionally, Im reluctant because I dont feel comfortable taking on the assignment. There can also be too much acrimony that flashes from negotiating. People can take the process, personally and become too ego-involved in winning. On the other hand, both parties can want a deal, any deal, so badly, that they come away with one that is flawed to such an extent that everyone soon regrets it. Thats the worst of all worlds. Feeling no tension, before a deal is consummated, isnt ideal, necessarily. It could mean there is a misunderstanding on someones part, needing to be corrected, fast. There is an expression in interpersonal relationships that comes to mind: A tumultuous courtship signifies an even more tumultuous marriage to follow. Monitor your emotions in any negotiation. While they dont provide perfect guidance, we can learn a lot from them, and use them to improve our skills, over time. |