"All that is necessary for evil to triumph is that good men do nothing." Edmund Burke

The kids will eat burgers and hot dogs. The adults will have steaks and salad. Ice cream will be our dessert, and strawberries, blueberries, and vanilla yogurt will make a celebratory appearance as a side dish. Seems a little funny that we remember the fallen by eating outside, throwing Frisbees, and drinking lemonade in the shade.

Yet this is one way we Americans have come to honor our heroes.

What began as Decoration Day after the Civil War in 1866, has evolved into a National holiday, celebrated across this great land of ours with picnics and barbeques. It all started with activist concern: Henry Welles, a resident of Waterloo, New York, felt that the soldiers who had died in the Civil War should be remembered and honored. His fellow citizens agreed, and everyone banded together and paid their respects by placing crosses and floral bouquets on each patriots grave. The town flag was raised at half mast. Local veterans held a processional through town.

Waterloo honored the fallen the next spring as well, and two years later, General John Logan officially proclaimed May 5 Decoration Day. It was officially observed on May 30, and the tradition beganafter World War I when the South joined in honoring their patriots as wellin 1882 when the name was changed to Memorial Day. By 1971, it was declared a national holiday, and now our entire nation looks forward, every year on this last Monday in May, to a day off from work, a day off from school, travel soccer tournaments out-of-state, gardening and all-day honey-do projects, extra coupons at the mall, and last but certainly not least, the aroma of beef cooking on the grill.

We have taken a day set aside to honor our heroes and turned it into one big, happy, American playdate. And I am as guilty as the next one.

So as I reflect on what sense of history and due respect I want to impart to my own kids, it boils down to the little things. (And isnt that the case with most things in life?) It requires that we instill in them respect for the principles upon which this great country of ours was built. It requires that we inject into them a healthy shot of patriotism when many hate everything for which we standwhile yet others risk life and limb to cross into our borders.

It requires that we impart to them the names of some of the tall shoulders on which our freedom stands. It requires that we remember.

So just how do we do thathamburgers and Frisbees aside?

Have a healthy discussioneven if its over hot dogs on your deckabout the hardships our country has had to endure to maintain our freedoms. Share with them stories of family and friends whose freedom has been jeopardized, or who never tasted its sweetness in the first place. My own in-laws sent their four kids on two separate planes to America without the knowledge that theyd ever see them again. They sacrificed everything in the name of freedom and democracy.

Commit to readsometime this yeara book on American history or on one of the wars in which our citizens fought. Even if its not your thing and youd rather curl up on the sofa with The Secret Life of Bees. Become painfully aware of the cost in human life of those freedoms which you so thoroughly enjoy.

Watch a war movie together with the older children in your family to help them get a realistic picture of the horror of war. Gruesome scenes can be fast-forwarded for those children not old enough to handle it; for many, seeing is believing.

Participate in a local paradeor attend as a cheering bystander. Show your enthusiastic support for those who have personally fought for your freedom. Flag-waving and applause for our countrys heroes go a long way in fostering national pride.

Take time out today to pray for our president, his closest advisors, and other world leaders. Maintaining strong leadership in wartime is an arduous task; offering up prayers for their endurance, emotional and physical strength, and wisdom to make the right decisions will go a long way towards binding us in our large circle of brotherly love.

Pray for families who have loved ones serving our country in the war, as well as in strategic positions around the globe in efforts to preserve democracy. Pray for peace for spouses and children left behind, and for the brave service men and women who long to be back in their loved ones arms.

Above all, be thankful. Be thankful for each one of the freedomslarge and smallthat you enjoy every single day because others were willing to sacrifice on your behalf. Never, ever take their actions, or these freedoms, for granted.

Enjoy this Memorial Day!

Carolina Fernandez

Carolina Fernandez earned an M.B.A. before working at IBM and as a stockbroker at Merrill Lynch. She left the corporate world to work as a full-time wife, mother, and homemaker.

Coming home to longer hours, harder work, and more demanding relationships left her feeling totally overwhelmed. Granted, she traded one investment field for another which has yielded immeasurable returns heretofore unimagined. Nonetheless, her frustration at her lack of ability in tackling all of motherhood?s inherently difficult challenges pushed her into a nearly twenty year labor of love. Her research in child development, child psychology, social psychology, nutrition, and exercise physiology, along with indispensable insights and experiences gained along the way, finally evolved into ROCKET MOM!

She re-invented herself in the process. She has dabbled in the domestic, performing, and visual arts, undertaking projects ranging from painting in oils to hooking rugs to singing onstage in Carnegie Hall. She has developed strong convictions about the role of the arts in child development; these convictions have shaped the specific strategies played out in the book.

She has a passion for inspiring creativity in people of all ages, from pre-schoolers to rocket grandmoms! Indeed, she receives particular joy in helping moms on the front line as they engage in what is arguably the most creative challenge ever invented: motherhood. To this end, she writes and speaks extensively, and is constantly developing teaching materials in her effort to share the crucial intervention of creative nurturing in developing children. She shares her message via radio and TV interviews; print media; and in speaking platforms via seminars and workshops, lectures and keynotes for pre-schools, women?s groups, retreats, civic organizations and adult education classes. Her soon-to-be-launched cable TV program, ROCKET MOM! will reach thousands of households in the Fairfield County area of Connecticut.

Her newly-formed Rocket Mom Society attempts to meet her mission head-on as she ?encourages, equips and empowers moms for excellence.?

She lives with her husband and their four children in Ridgefield, Connecticut.