When to say no

To others

Although it may be unintentional, the opinions of others can be dream stealers. If you have a dream and are convinced of its value in your life, then ignore those that say you cannot do it. Pursue your dream with all your heart, because that is where passion and life can be found.

To temptation

Have you ever noticed how temptation doesn't hang around very long when you firmly say no? Temptation, like the vampire that it can be, needs an invitation to stay around.

To yourself

Everyone I have ever known, including myself, is excellent at the mind bending trick call rationalization. We can twist our thoughts around so much that we convince ourselves of just about anything. But check out the word rationalize. In this case what it really means is to convince yourself of rational lies.

To stress and anxiety

Here is a riddle for you. What do a VCR, DVD and a human being all have in common. The answer is all three have a pause button. I'm convinced we use ours much less than we use the ones on our electronics.

Instead of reacting to the stress in your life, hit the pause button long enough to consider how you would like to respond instead of react.

Jeff Herring

Jeff is a marriage and family therapist, singles and relationship coach, mentor coach, speaker, syndicated relationship columnist and author.

Jeff has a full time private practice in Tallahassee in which he specializes in couples, teen and parent counseling. He also is a relationship coach specializing in working with couples and singles. Some of his professional activities include:

==> Internationally syndicated relationship columnist through Knight-Ridder/Tribune Media Services, with a weekly readership of over 10 million worldwide

==> Sought after speaker for organizations, associations, churches, and corporations

==>Twice weekly appearances on The Steve and Sara Show on Magic 107.1

==> Author of "Keep the Changes: 52 Tools for Successful Living" a collection of his best columns, as well as several e-books including "How to Create a Passionate and Loving Relationship.........Forever," "How to Beat the BOZOs: Dealing with difficult people without becoming one," and "Tame Your Teen: THE survival guide for parenting your teenager.

==> Founder and CEO of TheArticleGuy.com

==> Founder and CEO of SecretsofGreatRelationships.com

==> Founder and CEO of ParentingYourTeeanger.com

==> Founder and CEO of ToolsforSuccessfulLiving.com

==> President of BuildingYourIdealPractice.com

==> President of ConsciousDatingTallahassee.com